at least it feels like i am
what's wrong with me?
it's like i convinced myself this reaction is only expected and proper and hence i have to feel this way.
i'm even more upset with myself than anything else.
does it go back to when i found that i didn have the reaction i expected when you broke the news to me?
i highly doubt so but i cant think of anything else and it bothers me greatly
i wanna know why. i needa know why
am i stronger than i think i am? can i not accept the possiblity that i'm capable enough?
is there a part of me that begs to feel this way for fear that i'll be completely indifferent one day and all this that means so much now would mean absolutely nothing in the future?
i dont have a clue what's going on inside of me.
'cept that it's killing me
In a time no one knows.
you'll be alone without a care in the world soaking up the sun, the breeze, the sweet aroma of nature's finest.
to have no one who has a single clue about your whereabouts.
I have an urge.
I want that.
All done by my friendly neighbours on the kampung like street i live on.
guess chinese new years coming round the corner.
gong xi fa chai
and
xue ye jin bu everyone!
i prayed a prayer that went something like this a coupla months back:
"Dear Father in heaven, i'm tired of knowing that ppl love each other. i'm tired of knowing You love me. i've felt You before. but that was a long time before. what happened? i dont want to know anymore, i want to feel..."
my prayer was answered to its fullest.
i got to feel not only His love but yours too,
through you.
it's been a eons since i've felt this way.
-blissful :)
thank you.
thank you so so so mcuh.
everything everyone did has contributed much to the most fabulous birthday ever.
i've never felt so grateful, so comforted.
thank you.
i love you.
so much.
dedicated to all my loved ones.
i love you all.
you made me feel really good today.
loved the jap food, enjoyed the movie (adam sandler rocks my socks), the dory fish was scrumptious, the cake was heavenly and chillin at ice3 will be something i'll rmb :)
every moment of today makes me wanna thank God for placing such wonderful friends in my life.
i can't tell you how fortunate, blessed and grateful i feel now.
i'm also feeling extremly happy right now.
am gonna marinate in this moment.
LOVE YOU ALL SO SO MUCH!
This is a present my cousin gave me.
My dear cousin who loves me so much that he spells my name the way i like it.
a year passes by
you reminisce
Father, last year was a year filled with trials and tribulations and yet you have have delivered me so faithfully.
Some of my short life's low points have this year to thank for making possible
but
i rejoice
for they have only thought me how much i need You, how much i want You
Father i need You.
i want You.
As this year begins, i pray you continue to guide me
i pray you use me as you will.
May i forever be a child after Your heart.
I Love You.